The Ability To Just Be…

…and not fix anything. Most people want to fix things when they go wrong—solve the problem, make it better, get a plan together. But sometimes, there is no solution, or at least no immediate solution. And, without a solution, we may just back away, feeling unable to provide any help to a friend or family member.

Think about the day a job is lost, a medical diagnosis is delivered, or a relationship ends. All life-changing events that don’t have an easy solution. These, as well as others, may just initially require someone to show up with quiet support—a skill which the dog has innately mastered—until we can process and then  move forward.

Dogs seem to know when to just sit or snuggle close, maybe offer a gentle lean or touch. They comfort without fixing, help us to feel less alone in difficult times. They are solid in their comfort—unspoken but conveyed through a close presence and vigilant watching. They never judge the problem, how it happened or how we may have contributed. They don’t scold, punish or try to push us forward. At most, a young dog may try to entice us to engage by offering a favorite toy.

Usually, they just stay close and wait…and wait….and wait…for us to be ready to get back to life. Patience, loyalty, and devotion, all wrapped up in one amazing package.

So next time your dog frustrates you by not coming when you call, begging at the dinner table, or pulling towards a squirrel on a walk, remember the quiet times you needed someone to just be with you and stay with you, and your dog was the one who showed up.

Better yet, next time someone you care about has a life-changing event or just a bad day, do what your dog would do. Let them know that you’re right there, if they need you, and that you’ll wait until they’re ready to move on.